Follow my blog with Bloglovin

Crown of Love

They say it fades if you let it,
love was made to forget it.
I carved your name across my eyelids,
you pray for rain I pray for blindness.

If you still want me, please forgive me,
the crown of love is fallen from me.
If you still want me, please forgive me,
because the spark is not within me.

I snuffed it out before my mom walked in my bedroom.

The only thing that you keep changin'
is your name, my love keeps growin'
still the same, just like a cancer,
and you won't give me a straight answer!

If you still want me, please forgive me,
the crown of love has fallen from me.
If you still want me please forgive me
because your hands are not upon me.

I shrugged them off before my mom walked in my bedroom.

The pains of love, and they keep growin',
in my heart there's flowers growin'
on the grave of our old love,
since you gave me a straight answer.

If you still want me, please forgive me,
the crown of love is not upon me
If you still want me, please forgive me,
'cause the spark is not within me.
it's not within me, it's not within me.

You gotta be the one,
you gotta be the way,
your name is the only word that I can say

You gotta be the one,
you gotta be the way,
your name is the only word , the only word that I can say!

Only one that I can say!

La la la

La la la

Music Saved My LIFE

Music saved my life in 2007. I wanted to take my life. I didn't have a place to go or anyone to talk to. I was lost but not sure of where I was anymore. All I knew was that I could only feel pain and nothing was going to take that away. I wanted to numb myself but even that felt like it wasn't enough. I tried to have the courage to do it. I wasn't sure how I would. I wasn't in love with life or love or art or anything. Just wanted to die. Then this band, with this amazing song began playing loudly over the speaker and the voice sounded so strong and clear and it wasn't music about suicide it was music about living and fighting and never giving up.

I picked up the album that day and I heard it over and over and over again. And then I began singing each word as if I had written it. Every time I sang, I sang with love and hurt in my heart but this new fire in my soul. It was as if I had died and then came back to life as this strong woman. I knew that the reason I didn't want to live was because I somehow believed that I wasn't worth it anymore. Yet this music changed that so much for me.


Though I was still so sad and deeply depressed I had one thing I could count on… music. Music saved my life, music filled a void and when I hear that ONE song, one of many, I can feel my soul ignite telling my heart to keep going, moving my body and directing me to my own path. Music keeps me from losing myself and losing sight of what is important… LIFE.. no matter how bad or good or sad… I can still feel… and it's a beautiful thing.

Music brought me to my husband and together we've been able to over come so much and have this great and wonderful life.

Dreaming

I had a weird dream, the kind you dont want to wake up from because it's just that good and you cant wait to see what happens next. And even after you figure out youre having a dream you keep trying to stay asleep just because it's just like the best movie you have ever seen. I'm in the process of writing a book and I've probably re-written the thing like 10 times. I have a picture in my head how I want it to go but I never actually get there. SO this dream might be a bit of an inspiration. It was about a girl who lived and worked by the beach doing hair right by the water, and she meets three guys and she wants one because he's so dangerous and intense but then wants the other because he's so sweet and fun and smart, and the other she keeps around cause he'll never go anywhere… Throughout the whole dream she kept rotating these guys hoping one wouldn't find the other.. it was the best and most fun and I loved watching what she was gunna do next… like I said it was just a weird dream but it was a lot of fun to have this dream kinda go on in my head.

Girl Can't Help It

How can anyone say no to this?

All I really want is to look healthy and feel confident. I don't want to be hard on myself but I'm not taking my diet and exercise serious enough. I need to stick to it and I need to start getting the results I want. I have no self control. NONE! If I could just have a body that was a little lighter and tighter I know I'd feel better about myself.

Food is my addiction and I must take control. I start again and see how long this will last…. GOOOOOOO Will POWER!!!! My goal is to stick to the diet for a month… no soda more fruits and veggies, and working out or doing something very physical every other day!!! My affirmation for tonight, start this week with a clean slate, no cheats, soda, fast food, or laziness. I will work out three times this week and I will not fall to temptation! And so it is

I was going to try to alter my state today at the dentist but I freaked out from the pain. I hated the dentist today as she poked and jerked my head around while working on me. What the FUCK was her deal? I have a funny feeling it had a lot to do with me rescheduling my appointment twice. Still where did this girl come from??? Walmart? Oh holy numb mouth

Ryan McGinley

I love Kate Moss and I really love Ryan McGinley's work. I hope that one day I can be able to produce work like this… speaking of which I need models!!! Any takers?

Bad Ass Bitch

I love M.I.A, if I ever find myself in need of letting out my bad side I'll def be pumping this jam out like no othaaa! SOOKISOOKI Did ya see her flip off America on the super bowl… hahah that was funny

Free People

Free people make clothes that inspire me and motivate me to keep on dreaming. I just love the California collection it is simply beautiful.